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Share The Wealth

Not long ago I was meeting with a couple who began to use the dreaded phrases HIS money and HER money.  At one point the wife said they went on vacation and that she was upset because SHE paid for all of it.  This upset her because HE was suppossed to pay for the gas, but failed to do so.  I chose to play along and brought it to her attention that he gave HER $600 every two weeks.  She then informed me that was just for the house payment and utilities (not including the cable...he had to pay for that out of HIS money).  I hear that type of story more often than some may believe, but it is usually the man complaining about his wife not pulling her weight.    

In my home there is OUR money.  We have separate accounts for some of OUR money, but both of OUR names are on all of the accounts.  Why?  Because we are married!  We have a partnership and I am not my wifes daddy, boss, or financial manager.  And my wife is not my employee, daughter, or maid.  I realize that for some couples there may need to be more than one account because one or the other can't and refuses to manage money.  I'm just saying it is not a good idea to use words like allowances, my money/your money or my account/your account.  I know this isn't popular with some people, but I'm not writing this to be popular. 

You need to determine whether you are going to be roommates or husband and wife.  I am a big believer in financial responsibility and budgets, but not putting a spouse on an allowance.  You know who puts someone on an allowance?  Parents!  Treat your spouse like a child and you will get less sex than a 95 year-old man in an all male nursing home.  I suggest buying "The Total Money Makeover" by Dave Ramsey and forming a partnership instead of a parent/child relationship. 

Every day I'm Snufflin,

Tony Russell

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10/12/2011 10:50AM
Share The Wealth
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