What are You Kidding Me Stories of The Day
Out of North Carolina … God Bless Our Troops
The Democratic National Convention is coming under fire for a backdrop that was used during some of the speeches. The backdrop during a couple of the patriotic speeches was a huge picture of warships and then another was an enormous picture of F-5 fighter jets flying in formation. Only one problem…well two problems with these backdrops that they said were used to honor our military veterans. One, the pic they used for the warships were of Soviet-era Russian warships. In other words…it was a pic of our enemy of the cold war and then…then for pic number 2. Well that wasn’t our boys flying those F-5s…no that was the Turkish Air Force.
Out of Nevada … Dead Wrong
Walter Smaszko lived what appeared to be a fairly miserable life. He was sure the government was out to kill him and everyone else. He sat and read conspiracy books for hours and wouldn’t even go to the doctor because he was sure they would purposefully kill him. To say he was slightly paranoid would have been an understatement. And so when they found the elderly man dead in his home it wasn’t a complete surprise, and when they discovered that he only had about $200 in his checking account that wasn’t much of a surprise either. BUT when they opened up several, and I do mean several boxes FILLED with bars of gold…that was a surprise. Poor Walt wasn’t poor at all…those bars were worth about 7 Million Dollars. The sad thing was…that while Walt was alive he never really lived.
Out of Florida … Burn Baby Burn
We know two things about Byron Harvey…one is that his girlfriend must be a very large woman and two, he will go down in history as one of the worst shoplifters of all times. And here is how we know he is not a good thief…he was taking clothes and shoes into a dressing room and then he would take lighter and melt and burn the security tag off of them. Which as you can imagine sent off quite a smell to dept. store workers. And of course they called the law. When cops arrived they did indeed smell Bryon in the dressing room putting a torch to the security devices. So when he came out they busted him, and while Byron is not very smooth the dude was able to stuff some serious stuff into his trousers. Once cops busted him and frisked him they found $450 worth of shoes, clothes, and other items ALL stuffed in his pants. Oh and there were a half dozen pills in his pockets, but he blamed that on his ”woman”…he said his girlfriend had been wearing his pants earlier in the day and must of left the drugs in there.